Updated: Jun 29
A story of being in-between, weaving and the illusion of 'arriving'.
Are you giving yourself permission to be where you are?
Yes, you. Take a moment to reflect on where you are in your life. The stage you're in. Are you in a space of 'in between'? And if so, are you struggling sometimes with that decision of yours? The one about shifting gears, or getting the courage to leap? Are you longing to somehow pull your life's work together or surrender some big pieces of it? While I can't necessarily help you in this 5 minute read with your particular conundrum, what I can do is share my story.
Practically all my life, I've been lucky (to quote my friend Dana) to be 'in the right place, at he right time, with the right people', and...
Have you been in programs, courses, or communities and wondered 'why am I really here?' or 'Where is this leading me to?' In 2017-2018, I found myself exactly in that place. While immersed in my 'Holding Space Facilitator' journey (with international teacher and author, Heather Plett), as much as I loved the program (I was there for about 18 months, learning, assisting and diving deeper), I struggled with 'What does any of this look like on a business card?' 'How do I really use this in my work?'
I'd entered that training (which has now evolved into The Centre For Holding Space) as a Hatha Yoga and Bodymind Ballwork teacher, who was already;
'Retired' from a corporate career at the age of 34,
A mom of teenagers
In liminal space (but didn't know the term for it),
Leaning into the next thing, (but not entirely sure what that was yet), and
Desiring to 'decolonize' my teaching practice (but not having the language for that either).
These studies gave me permission to slow down. I did. And I also didn't.
The material (and connections with other people in the program) were a segway into a pretty amazing journey over the past 4 years. While immersed here, I simultaneously completed Circle Way training, and dove into conscious connected breathwork. This led to an influx of private clients with trauma symptoms looking for help, which led me to;
Seeking more in depth knowledge about that, and
Finding and incorporating somatic movement practices into my work.
This deep dive into quite a few 'amazing things' simultaneously is just how I roll. Those who know me, know I'm a life-long learner and like adventure (perhaps related to #7 Enneagram influence - for those of you who know that system, you'll get that) and, importantly, my privilege to do so.
And it made it a bit confusing for a while.
Led by my clients needs and my own curiosity, I pretty quickly collected elegant puzzle pieces but wasn't always clear if and how they'd all fit together. It took some time (meaning years). My teenagers joke that I have several 'masters programs in weird things'.
I'm pretty thrilled with what has emerged from this weave so far.
My professional practice has evolved into private and group somatic facilitation and coaching. My previous and current clients have helped lead the way to the current weave that you'll find in my offerings. And I'm pretty thrilled to include so much of what I love. My story begins to wrap up at place worth celebrating, including;
A major rebrand of my business 2 years ago,
Renting space (1 week prior to a major world crisis),
Developing my own unique somatic coaching program,
Weaving my new work into my online group movement classes.
Continuing practices of self-compassion and challenging those 'not enough' voices if they surface.
And it's a total illusion to think that I've 'arrived'.
At times, my process felt like it took a really, really, really long time with lots of 'stuck' places and uncertainty. And while I feel more 'actualized' in my work these days (because my pieces have come together and my clients are getting results), 'arrival' is just not the word for what I feel. Anyone who works in a trauma informed/therapeutic bodywork field knows, there is a never ending body of work to learn - from experts, colleagues, and from our current and future clients, and from life. The adventure has just begun.
That's my story (at least how I'm choosing to tell it today). A story of being in the space between, weaving, and 'non-arrival'.
And what are the paragraphs in your story? What are the puzzle pieces, and how do they fit (or not) together? How is your work evolving? Are you weaving it all in or letting pieces go? And are you giving yourself permission to take your time?
Enjoy a free live class!
Thanks for witnessing my story. You are invited to a FREE live, online somatic movement class Thursday, July 1 @ 9:30-10:30 am CST (on Zoom). Yes, I rescheduled it (gave myself permission to 'take my time'). Learn more and register here.